Lily is just the happiest, smiling, giggling little baby anyone could ever wish for.
I am trying, unsuccesfully I might add, to locate the pause button just for a while. I just want to stand still in time and relish every second with this precious little girl, time is passing by far to quickly.
I would also like to find the skip button so that we can avoid Lily's appointment to the paeditrician tomorrow.
It was supposed to be last month but because we were in the middle of that horrendous heat wave I re-scheduled it to this month, and can you believe it is going to be 39 degrees tomorrow! I should have guessed that would happen.
The last appointment back in December was just horrible, they test Lily's reflexes, joints etc and judging by the screams she let out it is quite painful. It shattered my heart to stand back while the paed carried these procedures out.
When he passed Lily to me she looked up at me with the most heartbroken, confused look, it reduced me to tears.
The only way she could be consoled was to put her on the breast. That is another added bonus to breastfeeding, if ever Lily is in-consolable this always does the trick.
The reason that Lily has to keep having regular appointments with the paeditrician is for a range of reasons:
~ Her horrible birth and the fact that she was born not breathing.
~ As a result of above she had very poor apgars 1,2 and 6.
~ This indicates her brain was deprived of oxyen for some time.
~ Some complications such as Cystic Fibrosis does not become apparent right away, for this reason Lily has to continue to be closely monitored until about 18 months.
I am not overly concerned, Lily has shown no tendencies so far that have worried me about any developmental problems.
I just don't like going as it is not a pleasurable experience for Lily and I still suffer a lot of guilt for what Lily had to endure.
On a lighter note though Lily is blooming (pardon the pun) and on all accounts appears to be a happy, healthy, content little baby.
She is happily rolling all over the room, chatting away and generally being very cheeky.
I think I have an unhealthy addiction to my camera, here are some recent pics.
My baby girl on her 5 month B'Day
Each month I take a photo of Lily with her teddy to compare how she has grown, it is so funny the many faces of Lily, here is a few.
I am sure nobody else is remotely interested in all of Lily's expressions, but I can't get enough of any of them!
3 comments:
Hi Jess
I can totally relate to your wish to hit the pause button as time seems to fly by all too quickly with our little ones.
I can uderstand how you would have an addiction to your camera when you have the most perfect and beautiful subject to photograph. Lily's smile is infectious and she is gorgeous.
Your breatfeeding journey really is a story of love, steely determination on your part and you being guided by your motherly instincts. You refused to let anything, or anyone, stand in your way when it came to persevering with breatfeeding.
I have just finished watching a show called, Bringing Up Baby (I noted that you also mentioned it in a previous post) and I was amazed at the ways in which mums allowed other so-called "experts" to dictate what they (the experts) believed was in the best interests of their babies. Often the mothers were not comfortable with what was suggested, but ignored their own instincts and followed the advice of the "experts". It is sad to know that some mothers are bullied into doing things that they are uncomfortable with.
My advice to any new mum would be to follow your instincs and don't let anyone make you feel judged. Easier said than done, I know. When you are sleep deprived, aching and doubting yourself, a comment from someone who seems confident and all knowing is easy to take on board, even it is against your better judgement.
All the best with your paedetrican appointment tomorrow. I hope the heat isn't too oppresive for you or dear Lily. Please keep us posted on how your appointment goes.
Lots of love
Elise
Hi Jess
Just checking in to see how you went with your appointment for Lily.
Hope the heat hasn't exhausted you both and all is well.
Love
Elise
Hi Elise
Thankyou so much for checking back in here, you are very sweet.
That ABC show is horrible, that 1950's woman is horrendous!
The most poignant part for me last night was when that poor lady was having her '10 minute and 10 minute only hug.' The look of pure love and contentment on that little girls face was so plain for anyone to see. She was so comfortable and secure in her Mums arms.
I think in the not to distant future they are going to look back and regret the choices they made. The saddest part is we all know just how quickly that precious time passes, and this cannot be replaced nor re-lived.
Thanks again for your lovely comments and advice, it is much appreciated.
Jess xo
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