Emotional

I am feeling very emotional and teary tonight.

I had my antenatal appointment today, and as usual my blood pressure is still high.
The obstetrician I have been seeing at the hospital is lovely, today she explained to me that at my next appointment in a fortnight I will have to see the head of department to discuss my 'case' this scares me like you would not believe.

She advised me that it is likely I will be induced and have bubs early and that at the very least I will not be allowed to go over my due date.

I am so sad, I feel like I am already failing my baby before s/he even comes into this world, I don't want to have high blood pressure, I don't want mine and most importantly my babies health compromised by high blood pressure and I most certainly do not want to be induced. I know the complications associated with inductions, I know that a great deal of them end up in emergency caeseareans.

The most frustrating thing is that there is nothing I can do to eliminate my high blood pressure, it is out of my control. I honestly am relaxed, it is not a stress thing.
I guess it was invetiable that I was going to face this, given my strong family history. I just wish that there was something that I could do. I am prepared to do anything to ensure that our baby is born happy and healthy, I just wish there was more that I could do.